Is there some cause for concern? Jewel Man?

Croaking | Skull & Toad

It had been a long couple of months for Skull. Your average Robot Master carried with them several terabytes of data that comprised the equivalent of their personality, their “soul”, if one were inclined to believe in souls. When that data is infected, or even just old, it can require quite a bit of time spent defragmenting and repairing. So DCN-008, Skull Man, had been out of commission for some time while he put himself through that process.

Waking up just in time to miss the annual promenade had been an inconvenience. He had, however, appreciated the time alone to finish diagnostics and make sure he was functioning properly before being sociable again. That kind of work on a behavior core was…risky. One might not return as the same person they used to be. So for now, Skull Man was taking it slowly; not jumping right back in to the person he used to be, for fear of getting it wrong. For now, he was just making himself useful at home.

The greenhouse was new. Or at least, it hadn’t been up before he went under. It was a good idea. With their home at risk of being buried in snow during the fall and winter months, it wasn’t always possible to go out and retrieve fresh sustenance for the human inhabitants. Their father and sister. Fresh vegetables were necessary, for this reason.

And even with very small clippers, Skull was a dab hand at their use, cutting at just the right places on tomato vines for the ripe berries to drop delicately into a wicker basket for collection. The work was relatively quick, but still had to be performed with care; any damage would expedite the process of decomposition, with the vegetables and fruit off their vines.

Fortunately, none of it had a long way to travel; everything was grown at Toad’s height, as he was the primary caretaker of the greenhouse. Skull was therefore forced to crouch through most of the work. A problem, given the music playing in the background - said to stimulate plant growth - was signaling him to move his body in rhythm, body language to show that the tune was, in fact, enjoyable to those within proximity.

"Bust a move, not a tomato, as the saying goes." He spoke quietly. There was no saying like that, and it was a safe wager no one before him had ever said that in the entirety of Earth’s history.

asker

Anonymous asked: If you could change one thing about any other robot or alien, what would you do?

Well, I changed Mercury Stardroid to “dead” once already, so my wish list is relatively short. 

asker

Anonymous asked: Who or what makes you smile?

Smiling is usually a subconscious reaction to pleasing events; these can be either genuinely happy and sincere, or achieved via schadenfreude - a German word, meaning “happiness found at the misfortune of others.”

In response to these abstract sensations, a select group of muscles tug appropriately on skin to form the smile. Subconscious smiling isn’t something I really do. I’m designed from the ground up to be fully in control of such body language. So when I do smile, it’s usually for the sake of wordless communication. To let my allies know a situation is progressing optimally, or inspire intimidation in a target.

ringsabell:

[There was a considerable gap of time between Skull’s message and any sort of reply from Ring.]

[It was mostly spent trying to sober up and figure out how to tone down his own programming. Ouch.]

Skull.

I want to talk about this later. There’s a lot I need to say as you’re my brother and literal next in line.

But I’m a little too inebriated right now. I’m making an idiot of myself over here; Toad can vouch for me.

Timing has been a real bitch to me lately.

Now that I am here, I am, with any fortune, not going anywhere. Take your time, брат. I’ll be here.

…In my room, reclining. While I enjoy this wine and some downloaded literature. Do not think I am missing out on the party just because I am not there to have it.

asker

ringsabell asked: THERe you are! Where the hell haeve you been and why aren't you paying yuor brothers a visit? It's one day! ONE DAY! Sorry if my text is a mess I'm a little drunk right now...

ringsabell:

skillandcrossbones:

I’ve been offline, брат. Allow me to apologize for not being able to visit the police station while utterly inoperative. I’ll make a better effort in the future; maybe bring a care package to your office. We can catch up.

No NO! Not my office! Hold on, let me think or at least fix my spelling. 

Yeah, anyway…

I don’t take visitors. I meant HERE. Why aren’t you here at the party with us? It’s only one night a year.

But you apparently answered my question. Are you okay? What made you go offline? Shit, I need to pull myself together this might be important.

My software and programming was all degrading. Heavy damage combined with my original programming simply…not being meant to stand the test of time. I had to take time to straighten myself out, simply put. With how much data there was, it understandably took quite some time.

I’m actually feeling better now than I have in quite some time.

asker

ringsabell asked: THERe you are! Where the hell haeve you been and why aren't you paying yuor brothers a visit? It's one day! ONE DAY! Sorry if my text is a mess I'm a little drunk right now...

I’ve been offline, брат. Allow me to apologize for not being able to visit the police station while utterly inoperative. I’ll make a better effort in the future; maybe bring a care package to your office. We can catch up.

asker

tenguman asked: Oh look, it's my favorite chew toy~ Whose closet were you locked in this time?

tenguman:

skillandcrossbones:

…Oh, it’s Tengu Man. You’ll have to forgive me, I have a hard time recognizing your face without dents in it. I’ve only had your head hung up on my wall as a reference.

I know, I clean up real nice, right? How about a dance. Or a smooch.

Sorry, the kiss of death is reserved specifically for people I wish to kill, but also respect. You only meet one of the qualifications.

asker

tenguman asked: Oh look, it's my favorite chew toy~ Whose closet were you locked in this time?

…Oh, it’s Tengu Man. You’ll have to forgive me, I have a hard time recognizing your face without dents in it. I’ve only had your head hung up on my wall as a reference.

asker

splishsplashtoad asked: >YOU'RE BACK!!!

splishsplashtoad:

skillandcrossbones:

splishsplashtoad:

skillandcrossbones:

>Yes, Toad. It is good to see you as well. I’ll look forward to everyone’s return from the promenade.

>Are you having a good time?

>They only have medium grade Vodka and to many Wily bots.

>It could be better.

>Why are you not here yet you should be drinking and singing with your brothers!

>I woke up too late. I don’t have anything new to wear, unfortunately.

>And I get plenty of drinking and singing with my brothers at home. Not enough quiet.

>Well aren’t you fancy. Ring made me wear a suit for this, it is tight and uncomfortable.

>Bah you and your quiet, enjoy it while it lasts, I will be making all of you help with the garden when we get back.

>Except Dive.

>I do not need more squashed tomatoes.

>I would be happy to help your garden, Toad.
>I’m a dab hand with a sickle. Hmhm.